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AUTISM CHANGES PERSPECTIVE: Lessons from a Little Theatre
We (I) needed a break from routine yesterday, so since it was early out day for Jack, we headed to the local children’s museum. We have a collection of favorite rooms in the museum that we have to hit: the climbing area, the drums, the laundromat, the bank.
Yesterday, however, Jack surprised me when he ran into a different room: the theater. There is a small stage with curtains, lights, music, and a fully stocked backstage with props and costumes. Other kids were mid-costume change, dance moves, music pick…but Jack just walked on stage and I was shocked to see a performance suddenly spill out of him. He was completely uninhibited. Dance moves, a kind-of bow, and was that a small smile I saw?
He did this a few times and I stood there with tears close to spilling over. I was so proud of this little act he was willing to do that day. It was such a small and natural thing for other kids to run up and play pretend. For us—after years of Jack digging in his heels as I tried to coax him to participate in a fun, childish activity—this was big.
But there was another side to my emotional response, and I felt guilty as I realized it.
I will admit that there was a time when I would have cried at this same scene, but for different reasons. There was a time that I would have cried sad tears for Jack, watching him awkwardly jump around in his own time zone and place. I would have been sad for the future and mourning what he ‘should have been’.
Autism changes perspective. And it helps us to see a new kind of potential.
As I watched him that day, I realized that the other parents next to me had no idea that there was a small breakthrough moment occurring just then. This boy was stretching his unknown personal rules, and this mom was another step into breaking down a ‘hidden agenda’ for how she thought her child’s life should look. I was thrilled for my Jack’s display of his brand of happiness. And I was proud of myself for accepting and embracing who he is.
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I’m crying with you, Amy.
And to Jack, from a performer to a performer (even if for only a moment), I’m proud of you for taking another step in your journey of learning and expressing yourself.
Thanks for your support Dan!
I love this post! I love what you wrote because it is so honest – you are mourning and loving him at the same time. And I love the video because jack is free and happy! What a moment for both of you!
This video of Jack melts my heart and is the most tender and amazing thing. I’m blessed to be a small part of his life. This little boy is absolutely amazing. Full of love and kindness. He brings light to my life every week. Love you Jack <3
Awwww. Thanks for all do for him!! I know he loves you too!